In what may be the funniest story of the year for me, John Moreland and Kyle Nix got into a bar fight. Let's back up a bit -- sprinkle in some Necessary Context(TM), if you will. According to Whiskey Riff, the incident allegedly started at Tulsa's Mercury Lounge. One of the publication's sources says that "John and Kyle were talking near the bar, and John allegedly struck Kyle, who responded by pulling him off his barstool. John got up and the fight continued until it was broken up."
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Specific details about the fight are sparse, unfortunately. However, if we're going by a now-deleted Moreland Instagram Story, something went down. "If you ever happen to get in a fight with Kyle Nix, the tiny fiddle player from the Turnpike Troubadours...uh, and he pulls you out of your bar stool and starts kicking you in the head a few times... Don't worry because he's four feet tall, and it's just going to feel like a f--ing third-grader is kicking you in the head. And then you can get up and start wailing on his face, and it's all good. F-- that guy."
Indeed, choice words were had! Moreland would apologize... to everyone but Nix. But never mind all of that! We have jokes and memes to cover!
John Moreland And Kyle Nix Get Into An Alleged Bar Brawl, And The Internet Rises To The Occasion
EXCLUSIVE: First photo of the John Moreland/Kyle Nix scuffle has emerged pic.twitter.com/UJh72rgFys
— friendscallmeJay (@Jaypotta) August 3, 2024
To be fair to the above poster, there is something to be said about the "size gap" between Moreland and Nix. I'm not saying that size is everything in a fight. I am saying, though, that Moreland looks like he wakes up and powerbombs at least three dudes before breakfast. You gotta admire Nix's bravery if the "rumors" are true!
"Fighting is never the answer." Boooo! Usually, I'd agree, but there's nothing wrong with the occasional petty bare-knuckle brawl! ...There are a lot of weight-related jokes at Moreland's expense, which definitely doesn't add anything of substance.
"Might be too invested in this John Moreland/Kyle Nix/Turnpike drama. Long live The Mercury." Release the details! We want a play-by-play of what happened! Nix hasn't said much about the whole debacle. But, hey. Sometimes, all you need is the idea of something to get the imagination flowing!
