If He Wins, Here's What Donald Trump's First Phone Call Will Be
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If He Wins, Here's What Donald Trump's First Phone Call Will Be

I can tell you what Trump's first phone call will be if he doesn't win. It'll be to the McDonald's that was kind enough to give him a trial shift despite no prior experience. However, Trump's also revealed what his first phone call will be from the White House if he does win.

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Donald informed the crowds that the first person he would call would be the new President of Mexico, to threaten her with a higher import tax. He claimed, during his final stage of campaigning, that his first phone call as the new president of the United States would be a good old threat to a neighboring country.

Trump's first phone call is intended to kick the Mexican government into halting the influx of Mexicans arriving illegally into the United States. He referred to the desperate immigrants as an "onslaught of criminals and drugs coming into our country." Trump believes that a threat of a 25% tariff on imports from Mexico will stem the flow.

He was adamant that this iron fist approach would work. Trump claims that if the initial threat of 25% doesn't work, he will just keep going. In a very logical next step, he claims "If that doesn't work, I'll make it 50, and if that doesn't work, I'll make it 75. Then I'll make it 100." I expect by that point, they'll just find other people to sell to.

Trump's First Phone Call Is Typically Aggressive

Of course, Trump's first phone call wouldn't be one negotiating peace, or finding aid for the millions of poor, it would be something territorial. He knows what works for his voters, and by the sounds of the baying crowds, this line certainly did.

However, Trump may be surprised to discover just how many of his own citizens have left the United States for Mexico. As of the latest 2022 census, 10.7 million US citizens have expatriated themselves to the much more habitable lands of Mexico. The cheaper living conditions, amazing food, safe streets, and rich culture appeal to a lot of US folks. Many Americans are able to earn their money in dollars, remotely, making Mexico a no-brainer.

Because of this, Trump's first phone call to the Mexican President may not go quite as planned. The influx of, albeit legal, US immigrants to Mexico has become a real problem in many places. They bump up prices, refuse to learn the language, often pay no tax, and force Mexicans out of areas through inflation. Maybe Claudia Sheinbaum will have something to say about Trump stopping his citizens from leaving in their droves too.