75 'Hocus Pocus' Quotes That Will Have You Cackling Like the Sanderson Sisters

What better way to ring in the spooky season than with a bunch of Hocus Pocus? The 1993 film wasn't exactly a box office success when it first hit theaters. But in the decades since, audiences haven't been able to resist pressing "play" on this Halloween cult classic, and memorable Hocus Pocus quotes always resurface year after year.

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That's thanks mostly to icons Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker and Kathy Najimy, who turn out memorable performances as the three wicked Sanderson sisters — or, as Midler's character Winifred puts it, "Sistahhhhhs!" They've been dead since 1693 after being hanged for the small crime of trying to suck the souls out of local kids in an effort to obtain immortality. When they're accidentally brought back to life 300 years later by teenager Max, who doesn't believe in all the "hocus pocus" in his new home of Salem, the sisters are right back to their old tricks. 

With the help of everyone from his wisecracking little sister to a zombie hellbent on the Sanderson sisters' destruction — and a distinct lack of help from the town's adults, who are busy partying in fantastic costumes at a local rager — Max has to get to work saving his new town from an All Hallows' Eve nightmare. 

The spellbinding movie has held up for decades because it has everything you need in an October movie marathon: a 300-year-old talking cat, incredible '90s looks, a sweet budding romance, teenage bullies wreaking havoc on trick-or-treaters, and all the bubbling cauldrons, spells and witches' brew you could imagine.

And, of course, there's those witchy one-liners that we're still quoting decades later. We've gathered our favorite Hocus Pocus quotes here — they're sure to keep you cackling through Halloween night and beyond: 

The 75 Best 'Hocus Pocus' Quotes

• "Oh look, another glorious morning. Makes me sick!" - Winifred Sanderson 
• Goodbye cruel world." — Winifred Sanderson
• "You got any cash, Hollywood?" — Jay
• "I am beautiful! Boys will love me!" - Sarah Sanderson
• "Dead man's toe! Dead man's toe and a dead man's toe! Dead man's toe! Dean man's dead dead dead dead." — Sarah Sanderson
• "Behold! A torture chamber!" — Winifred Sanderson
• "We seem to have a skeptic in our midst. Mr. Dennison, would you care to share your California, laid-back, tie-dyed point of view?" - Miss Olin
• "Well, in case Jimi Hendrix shows up tonight, here's my number." - Max Dennison
• "Nice costume. What are you supposed to be? A New Kid on the Block?" - Jay Taylor
• "Twist the bones and bend the back/ Itch-it-a-cop-it-a/ Mel-a-ka-mys-ti-ca." -- Sanderson Sisters

• "I'll have your guts for garters, girl!" - Winifred Sanderson 
• "I couldn't wear anything like that because I don't have any ... what do you call 'em, Max? Yabos? Max likes your yabos. In fact, he loves 'em!" - Dani Dennison
• "My lucky rat tail! Just where I left it!" - Sarah Sanderson
• "Ah! He makes fire in his hand!" - Winifred Sanderson
• "Stuff it, zit face." - Dani Dennison
• Everyone here knows that Halloween was invented by the candy companies. It's a conspiracy." — Max Dennison
• "Billy Butcherson was Winifred's lover, but she caught him sporting with her sister, Sarah. So she poisoned him and sewed his mouth shut with a dull needle, so he couldn't tell his secrets, even in death. Winifred always was the jealous type." - Thackery Binx

• "We're talking about three ancient hags versus the 20th century. How bad can it be?" - Max Dennison
• "It's a full moon tonight. That's why all the weirdos are out." - Dani Dennison
• "Next year we go trick-or-treating as Wendy and Peter Pan. With tights, or it's no deal." — Dani Dennison
• "For your information, he's a Little Leaguer!" — Dani Dennison
• "Let's see. Amnesia, bunions, chilblains, cholera. Tsk tsk. We can do better than that, I think." - Winifred Sanderson
• "You want to smash some pumpkins?" - Jay Taylor
• "Follow those children, you maggot museum!" - Winifred Sanderson
• "He has a little woman?" - Winifred Sanderson
• Billy: "Go to hell!" Winifred: "Oh, I've been there, thank you. I found it quite lovely."
  

• "Shove it, Satan." - The Master's Wife
• "Why was I cursed with such idiot sisters?" - Winifred Sanderson
• "Now, tart face, take your Clark Bars and get out of my house!" - The Master's Wife
• "Don't get your knickers in a twist! We are just three kindly old spinster ladies." — Winifred Sanderson
• "Boooook! Darling, come to mommy." — Winifred Sanderson
• "Sisters, look. 'Tis the chocolate-covered finger of a man named Clark." - Mary Sanderson
• "Tis a black river." - Mary Sanderson 
• "They're very health-conscious in Los Angeles." - Ernie "Ice"
• "Boooook! Darling, come to mommy." — Winifred Sanderson

• "Dance, dance until you die!" - Winifred Sanderson
• "Cat's got my tongue." — Winifred Sanderson
• "Come little children, I'll take thee away, into a land of enchantment. Come little children, the time's come to play, here in my garden of magic." — Sarah Sanderson
• "Farewell, mortal busboy!" - Sarah Sanderson
• "Tis firm! Tis firm as stone!" — Sarah Sanderson
• "You're going to turn me into one of those fat, useless, contented house cats." - Thackery Binx
• "I love you, jerkface." - Dani Dennison 
• "You know, I always wanted a child and now I think I'll have one ... on toast!" - Winifred Sanderson
• "I'm sorry, Emily. I had to wait 300 years for a virgin to light a candle." - Thackery Binx

• "It's all just a bunch of hocus pocus." - Max Dennison
• "Come! We fly!" — Winifred Sanderson
• "Hag tricks! Get him!" — Winifred Sanderson
• "Hag! Sistahs, did you hear what he called you?" — Winifred Sanderson
• "Thackery Binx! Thou mangy feline! Still alive?" — Winifred Sanderson
• "I put a spell on you! And now you're mine!" — Winifred Sanderson
• "I smell a child." — Mary Sanderson
• "Sisters, Satan has married Medusa. See the snakes in her hair." — Mary Sanderson
• "For three centuries, I've guarded their house on All Hallows' night, when I knew some airhead virgin might light the candle." — Thackery Binx
• "Damn, damn, damn! Double damn." — Winifred Sanderson
• "Damn that Thackery Binkx!" -- Winifred Sanderson
• "'Legend says that on a full moon, it will raise the spirits of the dead when lit by a virgin on Halloween night'...So let's light the sucker and meet the old broads." — Max Dennison
• "You lit the black flamed candle?" — Cop
• "It doesn't matter how young or old you are, you sold your soul! You're the ugliest thing that ever lived, and you know it!" — Dani Dennsion
• "Wench! Trollop! You buck-toothed, mop-riding, firefly from hell! I've been waiting centuries to say that." -- Billy Butcherson
• "You hag! There are not enough children in the world to make thee young and beautiful." — Thackery Binx

READ MORE: The 16 Best Family Halloween Movies For The Kids—And The Kids-At-Heart