Labor Day weekend just passed, so you know what that means. Why, it's time for a competitive ranch-chuggin' showcase! Yes, the dressing! No, I'm not kidding! Per Fox 17, that's exactly what Zach Orvis did over in Belding, Michigan! The Harmful Roester is a restaurant that hosted its first-ever ranch extravaganza, requiring one brave soul to down a 24-ounce glass of the establishment's ranch.
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There were multiple contenders vying for the crown. Even a 10-year-old child stepped up to the plate, saying, "I'm a kid; I'm the youngest person here. Good luck." The owner of the contest, Randy Roest, made special preparations for the big day. He brought buckets for those with more sensitive stomachs. And he also made sure everyone involved in the contest signed a waiver!
"How much more Midwest can you get than guzzling ranch dressing?" Roest said on the record. This is one of the most "small Midwest town" events I've ever heard of. The prizes for the contest also evoked that sense of "Yeah, this happened in Michigan." The winner would receive a $100 gift card! Additionally, the winner would look forward to a free order of all-you-can-eat wings every week until the spring of 2025. Truly, gifts from the gods!
Michigan Man Wins A Ranch-Drinking Competition
Orvis won the competition decisively, downing the whole glass of ranch in just ten seconds. "I've seen people pour about that much on their salads, so what's the difference?" Orvis said when asked how he could possibly accomplish such a feat. "I don't feel sick at all — it's just ranch dressing." A champion, ladies and gentlemen!
"I never asked myself what a champion ranch dressing drinker would look like, and then I saw this picture... yep," one Facebook user said. Look, there's nothing anyone will be able to say to ruin Orvis' day. The man won unlimited wings! ...Under set circumstances, sure, but he gets to enjoy the spoils of his victory!
There was a time when I could've done that with hot sauce. Now, however, I'd probably have to go to a hospital if I thought about chugging any hot sauce. Enjoy your wings, Orvis. You deserve them!
