Come on, surely you've been arrested over a plate of pasta, right? No? Well, pull up a chair -- I've got a weird one for ya! Let's talk about 21-year-old Nakhia Davis. Davis and her sister live in Florida (yes, another wild Florida story). Her sister ordered herself a nice ravioli meal, having it delivered to their house.
Davis, as the story goes, was quite upset to learn that her sister wouldn't be sharing her delicious pasta. So, as a normal person does, Davis threw a plate of ravioli at her sister. The arrest report for this incident made me laugh for a solid five minutes, and I'm not ashamed to admit that!
"The defendant got mad at her blood-related sister who she lives with after her sister (victim) brought home food. When the sister (victim) didn't allow the defendant to have any food, the defendant threw a plate of raviolis at the victim. The defendant admitted to throwing the raviolis and the incident was witnessed by the victim's boyfriend. The victim still had sauce from the raviolis on her when your affiant arrived on the scene."
We have to dissect that arrest report summary. It's mandatory.
A Woman Ends Up In Jail Over A Rogue Plate Of Ravioli
Firstly, you know what detail absolutely didn't need to be there? "The victim still had sauce from the raviolis on her." They could've struck that from the record. I can't imagine being the person who showed up and had to take the situation seriously when one person was covered in pasta sauce.
Further, isn't "ravioli" singular and plural? Just seeing "raviolis" made me chuckle. Also, I have to mention the website (The Smoking Gun) that initially broke this news and quote the end section of what's otherwise a report that's played completely straight.
"The arrest report does not indicate what kind of ravioli was used in the alleged attack or whether the pasta was coated in a tomato, pesto, cheese, or butter-based topping."
Sentences like the above personify why more publications should learn to have a bit of fun when covering certain stories. The serious stuff is always played straight, of course. But, come on. If absurdity comes your way, embrace it.
